More weird news - Texas 4x4 Forum

Go Back   Texas 4x4 Forum > Miscellaneous > General Chit chat.

Photo Gallery Places to Wheel Gallery III Home Forum Tech Section IRCChat FlashChat

General Chit chat. General non-wheeling chit chat between board members.

Texas4x4.org is the premier All All Forum on the internet. Registered Users do not see the above ads.

General Chit chat.:

More weird news



Reply
 
Share LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-31-2006, 07:44 AM   #1
Mas Tequila
 
Rastus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: San Antonio, Texas
Posts: 18,255
Rastus has disabled reputation
More weird news

In Austin, Texas, a man was arrested this month on suspicion of stealing hundreds of gallons of fuel from underground tanks while posing as a parking lot cleaner. He sold the gas from his driveway, police said.

Quote:
This is kinda shitty
"If you took one ton of a degradable material, dog poop and food scraps together, you could produce 50 gallons of liquid fuel," Reed said. "If you took 80 tons of this material, you could produce enough energy to produce [power for] a thousand homes."

And in Scotland.....

The National Health Service office in Dundee, Scotland, has recommended toilet techniques for the estimated one-third of the population that suffers from bowel and bladder dysfunction, according to an April report in The Times of London. The pamphlet, "Good Defecation Dynamics," lists preferred breathing habits and describes the proper, upright, seated posture for effective elimination ("Keep your mouth open as you bulge and widen"), and encourages support for the feet, perhaps "a small footstool." [The Times (London), 4-29-06]

Momma says stupid is as stupid does.......

Chesterton, Ind., high school student Michael Morris was hospitalized in May with a broken leg and broken arm after being run into by a friend driving an Acura at about 25 mph, but it was consensual. The friend described Morris as an adrenaline junkie who had had the friend run over him before, but Morris told the Times of Northwest Indiana, "I won't do this no more."


A man wearing a purple women's bathing suit and carrying a flare gun was arrested after he told a bartender he was going to "get rid of all the dirt bags in Key West," authorities said.

And last but not least.........

HOUSTON, Tex. -- NASA officials were embarrassed this week to announce the Space Station is infested with mice.

Project Manager Terry Duckworth told Weekly World News, "The female mice escaped from one of our onboard experiments and the male mice came up on a Russian supply ship, hidden in the cargo hold. Now we have a big predicament -- what we call UMP, or Unauthorized Mice Pairing. You might say, 'Houston we have a pest problem.' But I won't."

The mice have chewed through wires and insulation, and the patter of their feet has disturbed astronauts as they've slept.

For NASA, the solution was refreshingly lowcost. He may look like an ordinary housecat, but Charlie carries the fate of the multibillion dollar project on his tiny shoulders. "Charlie is my Aunt Ethel's cat and he's a great mouser," said Duckworth.

NASA has developed and manufactured a specially designed space cat suit for Charlie's imminent launch. He will be hoisted spaceward as soon as the shuttle returns to service.

"You might say we're hoping this will 'Kill the UMP,'" Duckworth said. "But I won't."
__________________
Fame is vapor, popularity an accident, riches take wings. Only one thing endures and that is Character.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RVREDDOG View Post
If you need a ladder to work on your rig you might want to re-think your suspension.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigevil View Post
thats the look a 14yo boy has the 1st time he sees his 1st set of boobies . its the simple pleasures in life
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4x4Freak View Post
Wood yoo lik two bi a voul? I have won four cell.
Rockkrawler
Zukikrawlers
Rastus is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 05-31-2006, 08:24 AM   #2
Mas Tequila
 
Rastus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: San Antonio, Texas
Posts: 18,255
Rastus has disabled reputation
6 New Cuss words it's ok to say

LOS ANGELES -- You can't say @#$% today. That's the &*@#$%! problem. Everybody's trying to be politically correct. No one wants to offend anyone . . . well, except for those jerks who flip you off on the freeway.

In the United States, we have sensational cuss words -- slang dictionaries full of them -- but most of us are too fearful to use them. As psychologist Dr. Herman Fugmunker noted, "It's dangerous to say '&*@# off' to a truck driver. Five days in intensive care convinced me of that."

But help is on the way. Fugmunker did extensive research for his latest book, Cuss Your Head Off, and came up with six new curse words it's O.K. to shout from the rooftops, because no one has ever heard them before. They're nasty, vile and disgusting. Learn 'em and use 'em. You'll let off steam and that @#$%head you're cussing out won't know what the &*@# you're talking about.

The six new curse words are pfnark, snog, kuq, chuz, jizzlewax and zighumple. They can be used alone or combined (to form compound curses); when you're mad or when you're happy; as adjectives, verbs, nouns and, especially, interjections. Pfnarkin' A!

Speaking of the word "pfnark," Fugmunker traces its derivation to the sleepy coal-mining town of Winsley, Wyo., where Dalwood Comstock fell down a murky shaft and screamed, "Holy pfnark! Somebody help me!"

Comstock was probably trying to say "Holy &*@#," but due to his speech impediment and a mouthful of coal, it came out "pfnark."

Fugmunker gives examples of how the word can be used. "Pfnark off, pigeon head!" "Go pfnark yourself!" and, "You're a pfnarkin' loser!"

The next word in Fugmunker's book is "snog," which sounds a mite dirty because it resembles "smog."

Changing the "m" to an "n" makes all the difference in the world, according to Fugmunker. "If you scold someone in an irritated voice by saying, 'Don't be such a snog!' the individual will cringe with embarrassment, for no one wants to be called a 'snog.' It sounds disgusting."

Colorful variations of the word include "snogpuss," "snog off" and "snoggle," as in "Snoggle this, you bastard!" And if you want to hit someone with a double whammy, you can say, "Snoggle this, you pfnarkin' bastard!" Of course, most people understand the word "bastard," so be prepared to put up your dukes or run like hell. And if you choose the latter, you can always get the last word in by shouting, "Kiss my pfnarkin' snog!"

"Kuq" (pronounced kook) was first heard by Fugmunker in a sleazy El Paso, Texas, bar. "This drunken cowboy walked in and said, 'What lily-livered kuq stole my woman?' When no one responded, the cowboy added, 'Well, whoever it was, I want to thank you, 'cause she was an obnoxious chuz.' " This brings us to the next word: Chuz. It can be used to describe a man or a woman, and it's quite unflattering. "Picture a bowl of clumped kitty litter, chunky spoiled milk and rotten chopped liver, and that's what 'chuz' looks like," Fugmunker explained. "So to call someone a 'chuzzbucket' or a 'chuzball' is the ultimate insult."

The penultimate word on the list is "jizzlewax." It conveys utter angst, as in "I'm totally jizzlewaxed. I'd squash my head in a vice if I had one!" It's another way of saying, "I'm totally &*@#ed up," without getting your mouth washed out with soap.

Last on the list, is "zighumple," which actually is more fun to do than to say, because when you're "getting a zighumple," you're partying, baby.

So there you have it, six new curse words you can say wherever and whenever you want. At least until they catch on. So don't be a dumb kuq. Get zighumpling!
__________________
Fame is vapor, popularity an accident, riches take wings. Only one thing endures and that is Character.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RVREDDOG View Post
If you need a ladder to work on your rig you might want to re-think your suspension.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigevil View Post
thats the look a 14yo boy has the 1st time he sees his 1st set of boobies . its the simple pleasures in life
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4x4Freak View Post
Wood yoo lik two bi a voul? I have won four cell.
Rockkrawler
Zukikrawlers
Rastus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-31-2006, 05:19 PM   #3
Wheels 4 Food
 
mudgod's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Palestine, TX
Posts: 5,743
mudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubismudgod Surfs Venus with Anubis
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rastus
The mice have chewed through wires and insulation, and the patter of their feet has disturbed astronauts as they've slept.

For NASA, the solution was refreshingly lowcost. He may look like an ordinary housecat, but Charlie carries the fate of the multibillion dollar project on his tiny shoulders. "Charlie is my Aunt Ethel's cat and he's a great mouser," said Duckworth.

NASA has developed and manufactured a specially designed space cat suit for Charlie's imminent launch. He will be hoisted spaceward as soon as the shuttle returns to service.

"You might say we're hoping this will 'Kill the UMP,'" Duckworth said. "But I won't."

"The patter of their feet has disturbed astronauts as they've slept."
__________________

P.I.Z.Z.A. I want pizza! P.I.Z.Z.A. I want pizza!



"we'll raise up our glasses against evil forces singin....whiskey for my men... for my horses"
mudgod is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
More Wierd News Rastus General Chit chat. 5 03-24-2006 12:10 PM
Bridgeport News cheder General chit chat for & about 4x4's. 0 03-17-2006 05:53 PM
Got some big news! MsHollywood Midnight Fourwheelers 14 07-08-2005 08:15 PM
Good news, bad news 4x4Freak Gas\Diesel Engine & Transmission 13 05-18-2005 08:44 PM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:56 AM.


3.8.8 - Powered by vBulletin
vBulletin Security provided by vBSecurity v2.2.2 (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2019 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Copyright 2002-2012 Texas4x4.org
 

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0